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OVERALL
BEASTS
BREASTS
Director: Richard Ashe
Writers: Bill Finger & Charles Sinclair
Cast---
Chase Cordell ...  Paul Carlson
Leigh Drake ...  Kathy Nolan (as Donna Leigh
Drake)
Gregorio Sala ...  Prof. John 'Johnny Longbow'
Salinas
Patrick M. Wright ...  Police Captain McCabe (as
Patrick Wright)
Francine Kessler ...  Janet Price
Timothy Wayne Brown ...  Dr. Sutton
Crawford MacCallum ...  Dr. Lawrence
Jeanne Swain ...  Caroline Harris

Runtime: 90 min | USA: 81 min (DVD)
TRACK OF THE MOON BEAST (1976)

 As I sat down to watch this film, who's title really intrigued me, I realized I had seen it before. But where?
Through some diligent Googling I realized that this little gem had the distinction of being featured in the
final season of Mystery Science Theater 3000! With that knowledge firmly in hand, I sat back and let this
Indian lizard movie work its magic.

 Paul is a shirtless archeologist in Albuquerque who spends his days in the blistering heat studying
pottery and dusting off rocks. He is met by his friend Johnny Longbow, an American Indian professor at
the local college and his two sidekick students. Tagging along is Kathy, a blond photographer that has
the instant hots for our sweaty adventurer Paul. Meanwhile, news of an asteroid crashing into the moon
is making headlines. The resulting collision will cause moon rocks to fly into space and they have
predicted that a meteor shower will occur sometime that night. After a meal of Indian stew Kathy is
anxious to get back out to the desert and take more pictures. Paul, feeling his own kind of hots for her,
offers to take her on a drive to see "the sights". They head off and spend the night walking through the
canyon. Suddenly, the meteor show begins and Paul is struck on head by a glowing moon rock. He gets
a scratch but nothing else, or so he thinks. Soon Paul is turning into a lizard monster and rampaging
around the little desert town.

 As people start dying around town it becomes obvious to the sheriff, the doctor, and Johnny Longbow
that a bipedal lizard is the most likely suspect. Kathy starts to wonder if something is wrong with Paul, but
he tries to convince her that all is A-ok. He, however, gets considerably sicker and we find out that the
moon is triggering his changes. He becomes a half-man half-tyrannosaurs Rex and attacks three men
camping in the woods, ripping one man's arm off and slashing another's face to ribbons, leaving the
third barely alive. The sheriff and his peeps are now convinced that some kind of monster is on the
loose. They call in Johnny for advice because American Indian superstition is rife with legends of lizard
men and in almost every scene we are reminded of the fact. Soon it becomes obvious to everyone that
Paul is somehow responsible and they have him checked out at a hospital. They find out that he has a
moon rock embedded in his brain that turns him into the monster. Since he seems to be the cause they
hold him at the hospital to keep him under observation. That night, as the moon rises, they all watch him
turn into something out of Kirk-era Star Trek and decide to find a way to remove the particle from his
brain. They don't blame him for the murders, which is very nice of them.

  However, when the brain experts arrive they explain that an operation is out of the question. The rock
is apparently multiplying and getting them all would mean cutting Paul's brains to bits. But the good news
is that they will eventually explode and burn him alive from the inside out. Paul decides to escape and
die as a man and not a monster. He disguises himself and steals a motorcycle on his way out. His first
stop is at a gun store where he tries to buy a gun to blow his head off, but he hears on the radio that the
cops are looking for him so he leaves and heads up to the Sandia Crest, the one place where he felt
free and untroubled, according to his friend Johnny. Kathy tries to find him, but night falls and she gets
caught in the hills with Paul in beast form. Johnny Longbow decides to grab his bow and make an arrow
out of a piece of the meteorite then hunt his friend down and blow him up to help him. It's the most
humane option. The creature attacks Kathy, but Johnny arrives in the nick of time and manages to shoot
his arrow right through its heart. Paul, the moon beast, dies amidst a psychedelic light show. In the end
he's reduced to ashes and all is right with the world...until the next lunar meteor shower that is!

 This is actually a pretty good movie. It's not great, but it's a decent, old-fashioned monster movie in the
vein of Roger Corman and AIP stuff from the 50s. I wish there had been a little bit more monster action
and the love story subplot threatens to overwhelm the movie with its soap opera schmaltz, but beyond
that I actually liked this movie. This may not be perfect for modern audiences, but those who like their
films more laid back and retro will dig this hidden gem. Plus the lizard monster actually looks pretty good.
A lot of people wonder if they can watch an MST3K movie without the accompanying riffs and I am here
to tell you that it is possible and I have done so myself on a number of occasions. The middle portion of
the film tends to drag a bit, but that's to be expected from this type of film.  When will they learn that we
care only about the monster and not his sex life! Unless the plot is about the monster impregnating
women to create more monsters, then it's cool.


                                                                                                         

         
                                                                                                    -Jose Prendes
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Track of the Moon Beast (1976)
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