Back in the early 80s Stephen King and George A. Romero teamed up to produce a horror film anthology based on E.C. Comics of the 1950s like Tales From the Crypt and The Vault of Horror. Thus Creepshow was born. King and Romero also worked closely on the sequel, Creepshow 2. Both films were great. They are fairly well known so we have decided not to include them on Splatter, but it’s scrappy sibling Creepshow III is right up our alley.

This movie has garnered a lot of crap from people because it’s not quite like it’s predecessors, it’s cheaply put together, and it often makes little sense; but gosh-darn-it it’s a lot of fun and I had a good time watching it! The anthology contains five creepy, goofy stories, woven together through recurring characters and locations. In the first story, "Alice", a self absorbed brat of the same name seems to be dissatisfied with her family and the neighborhood she lives in. Arriving home from school she finds her father fumbling with a gadget Professor Dayton, from down the street, made. It’s a universal remote control that ends up sending Alice to different dimensions where an earlier scene is played over and over, but with a different family in the house. Alice’s body begins to decompose and rot away. She’s forced to seek out Dayton for help but what happens when she finds him is probably not what she had in mind.

The next story is aptly called "The Radio". Jerry has a crappy job and lives alone in a bad neighborhood. He’s crushing on his neighbor Eva, who happens to be a prostitute. One evening his radio breaks and he buys another one off a homeless vendor. The radio talks to him in a female voice and encourages him to steal money, invest in stocks and kill people. Oh yeah, it also warns him not to put too much mayonnaise on his sandwich. He decides to run off with Eva and smash the radio but things backfire. In "Call Girl" we’re introduced to Rachel, a murderous hooker whom the press dubs "The Call Girl Killer". Victor is a regular guy who just wants some companionship on the weekend, while his parents are out of town. He sets up a rendezvous with Rachel. It turns out he gets his wood on by being handcuffed to the bed, blindfolded and fucked that way. Rachel is happy to indulge him but Victor turns out to have some deadlier habits. In the end you’ll never guess who ends up being fucked over!

In "The Professor’s Wife" we get to know Dayton a little better. You’d think the man had no social life with teaching and lab experiments, but you’d be wrong. He’s getting married! The old professor invites two former pupils to his place to share the good news and meet his fiancé. John and Charles are surprised because Dayton’s been known to be a practical joker. They surmise that being a quantum engineer and all, that he manufactured the perfect woman. After all Kathy, his fiancé, is a hot young blonde bombshell, soft-spoken and a wiz in the kitchen. Could Kathy be the top secret experiment Dayton had been working on for a large part of his life? The final story is called "Haunted Dog". Dr. McKinney is forced to do community hours at a walk-in clinic and hates every minute of it. One morning, while running late as usual, he drops his hot dog breakfast and hands the filthy meal to a beggar. The tramp gobbles it up but becomes sick and spasms on the ground as McKinney walks by. The homeless man passes away and starts haunting the asshole doctor for being such a prick.

This film has a lot of real cheese ball moments. You either like this type of humor or you don’t. The movie is quite awful, but endearing in it’s own way. Oh(!), and it’s bloody as hell too. Turn the lights down after inserting the DVD into your player and chuck any and all expectations out the window and you should be able to have a good time. It is what it is.

- Jorge Antonio Lopez